The Most Fabulous Watermelon Rind Pickles Ever

I sure am lucky to have such a selective memory, because I always seem to forget how much work watermelon rind pickles are. I only ever remember how much I love them. So when I found out there is actually a category in the State Fair pickle competition specifically for watermelon rinds, I knew that I had to submit mine. Once I win my blue ribbon, I'll gladly share my recipe with you all. It's based on one in the Joy of Pickling book, with some spice alterations of my own that I came up with after experimenting all last summer. I really think this batch I've just finished is really going to knock your socks off!

To begin:

Ask your favorite farmers how thick their watermelons' rinds are. Or if they are growing heirloom watermelons. Heirlooms tend to have thicker rinds. Seedless tend to have thinner rinds. Know your farmers, ask them about their produce. How I found my fabulously thick-rinded melons this year? I asked one farmer if his watermelons had nice thick rinds because I was going to be pickling them, and he said no, but said that that farmer over there, with the red awning, had super thick-rinded ones. How cool is that? So I got:

And scrubbed them good. These were small melons. Smaller than I would have liked. Like tetherball size.

See how nice and thick the rind was?

Commence watermelon deconstruction.

So, yeah, that took about 2 hours. You really have to get every bit of pink off. Lucky for me that cute paring knife is super sharp, and my fantastic ceramic peeler is killer on the tough rind. Also, I had total prune hands when I was done. Watermelons really are all water!

So then, because I'm a big nerd and I really want to win, I took teeny cookie (well, the label said they were for aspic but the thought of aspic makes me shudder...) cutters to about 1/3 of the rinds. These will be specifically for the pickles I submit to the state fair competition. The Victorians used to cut their watermelon rind pickles into fancy shapes, so that's what I'm doing for mine! Of course, that added another couple of hours to the rind prep...

Hearts and moons and stars... and clovers! I expected some kids to chase a Leprechaun through my living room. Then 1/3 of the batch is scraps from the cut-outs, and the last 1/3 is just squares. So after 5 hours of peeling and trimming rinds, into my brining solution they went until the next day...

The brine:

Sunday was rinse and boil day! How exciting! After brining overnight and rinsing thoroughly to get all the salt out, it was time for a brief simmer. I love the results of this phase... so pretty!

Then it's time for the final soak in the pickling liquid. I prepare my dry ingredients....

I'm not telling what's in those spice bags right now... you get the general idea. The general, delicious idea!! Combine those with the vinegar (I'm not saying what type or types I used! This is my blue ribbon recipe here!) and sugar, bring it to a boil, toss in your rind, and then soak it overnight again.

Note that not all recipes are this long and drawn-out.... but I tried out a bunch of different methods last summer and this one was so much better than all the others I really think it's worth the time. If you find a recipe that's shorter and you love it, that's awesome! You make whatever pickles you like the best!

So now it's Monday night and I've just finally pulled my last batch of half-pints out of the canner... Phase III was simply bring the rind up to a simmer in the pickling liquid, simmer until it was translucent, then can it. 

I ended up with 13 half pints! 4 short fancy jars of square-cut rinds, 4 jars of fancy shapes (I'll pick the best to submit for competition, the others will be special gifts or special occasions... Mendelson Brunch, I'm looking at you!) and 5 jars of scrap shapes... those will be gifts for my creative friends! Like looking at clouds... they can find ones that look like a dinosaur riding a bicycle! Or a clown shooting a bow and arrow! Oh, it'll be ever so fun!

The end. Wish me luck at the State Fair! And come with me on October 9th to watch the demolition derby!